I tried to attend a funeral yesterday. A friend (a woman from our church who was among our occasional social circle, and who was a very sweet lady and very kind to Penny) died of cancer last Friday. They had the funeral yesterday, and I was able to show up, to bring food, to listen for a brief moment, but then it became impossible.
Since I consider it impolite to go to a funeral and cry harder than the family of the deceased, I didn't stay, at least not for the service. I had some food at the reception and couldn't talk to Don at all.
I was feeling some soreness in my sinuses from holding back, and then a definite roughness last night. When I woke up, someone had taken out my sinuses, sandpapered them, and put them back in. It hurts like hell, I'm coughing, drowning, and I have to work tomorrow as well. I hope the cough syrup will do something tonight.
I also learned that Penny's brother's wife left him last week sometime - which makes me feel deeply nauseated. I don't want to lose track of Penny's neices, but without that connection, I'm likely to. I hope things straighten out for them. She didn't say why she left, apparently, but I'm guessing it's something stupid about money. She's not the kind to cheat. I think.
I want less drama in life. No more deaths from hideous painful diseases, no more wars, no more selfish, evil people in government, no more hate, and no more breaking up without talking.