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February 16th, 2007

26. 394.

(sigh) time to start training again

I studied aikido back in 1980 when I was living in Berkeley. Six months, but it gave me reasonable poise in weird situations for a long time.

Unfortunately stress cataplexy is part of narcolepsy, and mine is worse. If I get really angry, I shake and can't focus well.

So, when I come across something really stupid, I'm not able to deal with it like I should.

Today, in the store, very busy, and a man in his late 20s was standing in front of the entrance to the only lane that wasn't full. He had a six-pack of that cheap-ass party wine (1.5liter bottles) and looked like he was off in outer space; the woman in front of him was beginning to sign her check and the loading area was empty, so after about 30 seconds, I cleared my throat and asked, "Excuse me, sir? Are you in line here?"

He looked at me with the same drunken outerspace stare, then said, "WHUT? You talking to ME?"

"Uh, yes, are you in line? Because if so, would you please move forward so other people can get in line and I won't be blocking them?"

"YOU DID NOT JUST START WITH ME! YOU dont want to MESS with me, MAN"

To my disgrace I didn't just shrug, say "Whatever (drunkard)" and leave. Instead, I said, "What messing? I just asked you if you were in line, and if you were to step forward."

At that point I met his gaze, and glared at him for far too long, before saying, "You're not worth it, asshole," and going to another register. When I got there I was shaking like anything.

So, I know I handled it wrong, but was I wrong to ask him if he was in line?
And was his reaction appropriate?


This is, however, a definite "get your butt back to the dojo" reminder.